I can't deal with myself anymore. I cry myself to sleep every night and for the 81 days I've been clean, I have strong urges to cut.
I don't know what I'm doing after high school or frankly if I want to do anything at all because my depression is so consuming. This decision is leaving me panicked for another year until I graduate and really have to figure things out.
My heart feels like it's in pain as does my head as I cry and write this. I'm trying desperately not to cut. Don't tell me I'm strong because even the greatest weight lifters have to put down their weight sometime. I just happen to be holding a million pounds and I am crumbling under it.
My therapist gave up on me and dropped me as a patient because nothing worked. Ive tried all the coping skills, nothing works.
I want to die. I'd call the hotline if I wasn't terrified of talking on phones so here I am.
I can't tell my mom or dad. I can tell my school therapist but that means having to hold on another 12 days.
I don't know what I'm doing after high school or frankly if I want to do anything at all because my depression is so consuming. This decision is leaving me panicked for another year until I graduate and really have to figure things out.
My heart feels like it's in pain as does my head as I cry and write this. I'm trying desperately not to cut. Don't tell me I'm strong because even the greatest weight lifters have to put down their weight sometime. I just happen to be holding a million pounds and I am crumbling under it.
My therapist gave up on me and dropped me as a patient because nothing worked. Ive tried all the coping skills, nothing works.
I want to die. I'd call the hotline if I wasn't terrified of talking on phones so here I am.
I can't tell my mom or dad. I can tell my school therapist but that means having to hold on another 12 days.
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