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My boyfriend and I keep trying to have sex, and its been hurting a LOT anytime he tries to push past like 1/2 a centimeter inside me, as my hymen is still very intact. He's technically been inside me so am I still a virgin? My doctor said I have to work on stretching down there everyday for about a month with exercises before he will fit without a ton of pain, since I am on the small side. I got kind of mad at a few things that my boyfriend said, and I Feel bad bc I got kinda mad at him today. We both agreed to not tell ppl about what we had and hadnt done and he proceeded in asking this really really creepy guy who had been harrassing me before, if it was normal that he couldn't fit. I got really mad, but then he said he didnt think the friend would piece the question together as having anything to do with us. I also got mad about some insensitive comments about things earlier, like I told him if I were to get pregnant my parents wouldn't let me get an abortion bc they feel its killing a child and so do I and he got all upset like how could they not let you. He gets upset about killing ants, yet this somehow isnt a big deal to him. I told him that I was still kind of offended by what he said before and I didnt like his reaction. I said I was offended by this, and he was all "What are you like pregnant or something" and I was like NO NO NO like I just felt really pressured by him at first. Anyway...its just frustrating he has all these unrealistic expectations like first time sex isnt supposed to hurt and just be great and thinks its like wierd that its not like that with me. I feel bad bc I got mad at him about a lot of this today, I just felt I needeed to talk about it because I was kinda pissed about how he had been acting in a few ways. Was it normal that I was pissed off?
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Having sex for the first time is very personal and a decision that only you can make. I know that you said that you have gone to the doctor, but if you continue to be in too much pain and you haven’t had sexual intercourse then you should probably go to an OBGYN doctor to make sure everything is okay, your primary doctor can refer you to one. With that being said it’s not uncommon for the vagina to have pain or even bleed sometimes after sex, even after the hymen is broken. Check out this link from the Mayo Clinic that can explain a little about this @ http://www.mayoclinic.org/symptoms/b...n/sym-20050716. You can also check out this link for Planned Parenthood @ https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn. It has a lot of useful educational information on safe sex, and much more. Planned Parenthood also can give you a checkup. If you have any question you can call them at 800-230-7526.
You mentioned that you and your boyfriend have discussed some things about having sex, like keeping it private and pregnancy which is good. Remember it is important to be clear about your boundaries and what you are comfortable with when it comes to your body and sex. If you did not like some of his comments then address it with him so there is no confusion about how you and he feel. Communication is the key. I cannot speak on whether it is right or wrong for you to be angry at him that is between you two but just talk about what has made you upset so you can move forward in a healthy way. If you want to talk about this or anything else please call 2NDFLOOR at 888-222-2228 or text us daily 4-8PM. -
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I talked to an obgyn about this and that was the doctor I was referring to. He said it was normal but I don't really think it is because my opening looks like a micro perforate hymen the opening is very tiny.Comment
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If the doctor is saying it is normal it likely is, but it's not uncommon to feel like something is wrong/different. You can always get a second opinion if you aren't happy with the results from your other appointment. If you want to talk more call 2NDFLOOR Youth Helpline 24/7 or text us daily 4-8PM at 888-222-2228.Comment
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