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I'm a freshman in high school now, and since 7th grade I've been positive that I like girls (guys too..), which started to become apparently in 5th grade. I've struggled to label myself, so I'm trying not to do that because I don't feel like I fit into any sexual orientation. I tend to lean toward pansexual/lesbian. I'm not sexually attracted to male parts, but I'm sexually attracted to females. Lately I've wanted to be around guys, like wanting to cuddle/hug etc. I don't want to date them or have sex, I just want to touch them. I'm so confused. I'm still attracted to girls. But I've never looked at someone and wanted to have sex with them. I don't understand these connections I feel toward certain people. I'm not asexual, I feel sexual attraction, but I've never met someone I wanted to have sex with. I don't know if any of this makes sense to you, because it really doesn't mke sense to me. It's embarrassing to not be able to explain it when people ask.
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There is no reason to be embarrassed and you also don't have to explain yourself to people when they ask. It is possible to be sexually attracted to one gender and romantically attracted to the other. We all have different preferences. It often takes time to develop our sexual identity and we all question it at some point. It sounds like you are just trying to sort out all of your feelings. Perhaps it would be helpful to take a step back and not focus on explaining yourself or labeling yourself right now. That may add some additional pressure or frustration. Take your time in sorting all of this out. We all need time to figure out what we like and don't like in sexual partners and relationships. Perhaps it would be helpful to talk to a close friend about this or someone that you trust. You can also check out the website www.sexetc.org or The National GLBT Talk Line website @ http://www.youthtalkline.org/ or call (800-246-7743). If you need to talk more call 2NDFLOOR at 888-222-2228 or text 2NDFLOOR on Fridays at 908-280-0235 from 4-8 pm.
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