Caffiene addiction

[Unregistered]

I've had this really bad addiction to caffiene for awhile but it's gotten worse and i've been taking up to 700 mg of caffiene after all the pills and coffee I drink a day. It helps me with so many different things, but I am scared of overdosing. I believe I almost already overdosed twice, but I still don't want to stop. It makes me do better at school and at the job that I work at. My parents don't know about it because i've hidden the pills. I would tell them but they will just take everything away from me and make me stop, and I really don't want that to happen. If i'm feeling sad, the caffiene can make me feel better or just completely forget about the sadness altogether. I don't think it's necaserily great for my ADD but it helps me stay attentive and sociable regardless. If I hadn't had caffiene in awhile, I will get cranky, experience extremely bad headaches, not feel like myself at all, and just be so tired to the point where I honestly can not do anything. And I might feel depressed too. It's been the best solution to my feelings of depression and I keep telling myself that it's better than ciggerattes and other hardcore drugs. I tried stopping but it made me want to not live anymore. It feels like without it, I won't have anything to live for. Which I know is a crazy thing to feel but that's how I felt before I started and when I stopped. Caffiene also helps my appetite get lowered, which isn't necasserily good but it makes me feel better anyways. Without my caffiene, I might start smoking ciggarettes and/or weed again, or I will just get wayyy to depressed and I don't want to feel that again. Overall, i'm not afraid of death. But I still don't
want to die. But when I feel sad, i just don't care anymore and it doesn't matter. Idk if that's considered suicidal or not but that's how I feel. I want to live a full life though. The caffiene also keeps me up and all in all, it feels like i'm sort of in this big trap and I really don't know how to get out. I just know that it makes me do better at school and work and I feel better altogether. I don't know what to do. Last time I stopped, I started self-harming, which isn't good either. Idk what to do

[2NDFLOOR]

It sounds like you are definitely going through something, so we are glad you reached out to 2NDFLOOR. I have to start by saying that if you are having thoughts of hurting yourself ever please, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255- http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ or go to your local hospital’s ER so they can do a crisis evaluation. There’s always someone available to help, day or night. You are not alone!

Now, if you feel that you may have a real addiction to caffeine then I would talk to your parents about it so you can get help from a medical doctor. It can be dangerous if you are taking too much so don’t hesitate to reach out to a professional. Professionals are prepared to handle anything you say to them so be honest. Have you ever thought of seeking counseling as well? Maybe you can start by using the resources that are available to you, like speaking to your guidance counselor at school. It can be very beneficial to vent and talk about your struggles in a nonjudgmental environment. It’s also important to have a support system in your life so is there anyone you can confide in? Friend? Parent? Aunt or Uncle? Grandparent? Sibling? Sometimes just sharing your feelings can make you feel better. Just don’t isolate yourself with your negative thoughts.
Lastly, you mentioned that you think about self-harm at times, one thing that absolutely does not help a situation is cutting. That is a temporary feel good that seems like an answer, but in reality does nothing to solve problems, it just creates new ones. Try to check out this helpful website called Teen Self Injury @ www.self-injury.net for more info and help, you can even call them @ 800-366-8288.
If you would like to talk more about anything call 2NDFLOOR anytime at 888-222-2228 or text us daily from 4-8PM.