I have problems that aren't real.

[ext]

I spend a great deal of my time roleplaying online. I co-run a big group, actually. I've been doing this for more than half my life, but this level is a lot more intense.
It's the only way I could socialize frequently because I don't get to see my friends often and I don't have my phone.
But in the roleplays, there is so much drama. It's fun and I have friends. My characters have feelings and love people But they're getting hurt, so I'm getting hurt.
Last time I quit roleplaying I didn't have anyone to go to and ended up attempting suicide. (not because I wasn't roleplaying, but it truly would have prevented it).
I have all these fucking problems that aren't real and I can't bare to get rid of them.
-ext

[2NDFLOOR]

Don’t feel that your problems or feelings aren’t real. Everyone’s feelings are valid and if you are struggling with some things in your life then they are real to you. It is great that you reached out to us because it seems that you have a lot of things that are distressing you at the moment. It must be challenging to feel that you do not have anyone that understands you except the online games. Have you ever tried talking to someone you trust about your feelings? Do you talk to your parents?
Here are two things you can try:
Try to journal your thoughts, it’s a beneficial outlet and coping skill when you are feeling down or alone. Another is to start an exercise routine to get yourself out of the house and occupy your mind.

The worst thing to do is nothing. Isolating yourself and your feelings is not a good thing when you have struggled with suicide before. It sounds like you would really benefit from professional help. Try to reach out to a counselor, here is a number to NJ Mental Health Cares (866) 202-4357. They have referrals to local mental health providers as well as 24/7 emotional crisis screening locations. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-8255 can help with a crisis as well if you are ever having thoughts of suicide again.
You are not alone, there are professionals that can help you. I hope this has helped and if you want to talk further, call 2NDFLOOR at 888-222-2228 anytime we are here 24/7