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Im under so many pressure and I dont know what to do, so I am hoping this forum will help me. I am 15 yrs old girl and I had never been diagnosed eith a mental disorder. I just feel like im having intense deep overwhelming painful feelings that slap me unexpectedly then leave me crying. Its gotten to the point where I unconsciously eat less so I can feel something physical. I lost like 10 pds the past 5 months and I just get a tight stomach that I just cant sit and eat. Also, Ive been breaking pens, pencils, scratching myself, and I just keep praying that I get badly sick so that I dont have to go to somewhere I dont go that next week. No im not suicidal and I dont self harm. Im sure of that. Know one knows it and I dont have friends to confide in. Im just sick of second guessing, putting myself down and regretting. Hwlp me, idk tell me something that will not make me give up on success and happiness. I cant get "help" cuz my mom is grieving from a family crises that happened that I dont want them to freak out. Also I cant talk about it because I feel funny and I have an aversion from the word feelings.
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I am sorry to hear that you are going through a tough time in your life right now. It sounds like the first thing you have to do is get to the bottom of what is causing these overwhelming feelings. You should not continue doing this alone and you don't have to. Talk with an adult you can trust. The easiest, most available, confidential and non-judgmental resource that you have is your guidance counselor at school. They are somebody who can talk with you about your feelings and guide you in the right direction. I urge you to make an appointment as soon as possible. I know you mentioned that you don't want to talk to your parents because they are already stressed out about a situation but no matter what is going on in their lives they are always there for you. You can't be scared that you are going to add to their worries. You are only 15 and you do need their help. They can possibly even help to find you a counselor outside of school. If you feel uncomfortable initiating this conversation with them, then write them a note just like you did on here so they will initiate the topic with you. You also can't believe that what you are experiencing right now is "forever". It is temporary and you have the opportunity for a lifetime of success and happiness ahead. However, in order to keep these feelings from growing and getting any worse, you must reach out for support. You have the power to control the direction you want your life to go in by making the right choices that will help you take care of yourself. Here is another helpful website to check out: http://us.reachout.com/. If you would like to talk about this in further detail you can call us here at the 2NDFLOOR Youth Helpline. We are here 24/7 at 888-222-2228. You can also text us daily at this number between 4pm and 8pm. Please take the first step in reaching out to at least one person for help. Be brave, you can do this! Good luck. -
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The feelings are in result of hoe my parents treated me all along. Theyve mislead me and taught me that ur not allowed to make mistakes, and that being sad is weakness. And then, I met this teacher who taught me otherwise. She knew and understood my anxiety before even said anything about it. She give me that feeling of saftey and understanding that my family easnt able to give me. Do this makes me compare them and say that id be happy if she was my mom. So yeah. ..Comment
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I am sorry to hear that your parents raised you this way but they could have been raised the same way. Everyone makes mistakes, that's how we learn and grow. I am happy you found this teacher that supports you and makes you feel safe and understands you. Maybe she could sit down with your parents to discuss some of your feelings? Have you tried to talk to your parents about how you feel? Do they know you have anxiety? Maybe you should reach out to your counselor at school also. They are there to help. I understand you feeling this way towards your teacher. She is truly listening to what you have to say without any judgement. It is not unusual that you feel very close to her. I would definitely either you trying to speak to your parents letting them know how you feel or sit down with your parents with your teacher or counselor. If you decide to to this, it is helpful to write down exactly what you want to say. It can make things much clearer. Even if you use that paper during the conversation, it will keep your thoughts together. Sometimes nerves can get in the way. If you need to discuss this any further, you can call 2NDFLOOR 24/7 or text any day between 4-8 PM. Our number is 888-222-2228. Good Luck and stay strong!Comment
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