I'm sickened

[Guest]

Today was one of the worst days of my life. The topic of me not trusting a friend was sprung upon me yesterday. I have a group of friends of about seven people and one other friend and I are never invited to a hangout unless we set it up. We felt left out but I was ok with it because i trust them. The whole group has had fights before but it is usually over one situation. It's always over text and for some reason, no matter how hard I try only one or two people agree to talk IN PERSON. This is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. At school everyone acts like nothing happens when I bring it up but as soon as they get on the text it us chaos. I had noticed they never wanted to solve it and that was when problems began. When one friend asked me if I trusted another, I said yes, with all my heart. And then it escalated into targeted attacks towards me. They start bringing up things I don't recall and accusing me of doing things I genuinely don't remember. The friend doing this later revealed that she and the friend she asked if I trusted or not had talked about me behind my back. This did not bother me at all. I am generally a confident person and am not easily hurt by that kind of thing. I apologized a million times for the things I supposedly did and we decided to just let everything out so it could be over with in one shot. However, no matter how many times I was sorry for the things "I did" I never heard a single sorry about the things that had been bothering me. At that point the friend who had wanted to know if I trusted her revealed that they had all talked over the summer and had decided to split me and two other friends from the group WHICH I WAS COMPLETELY UNAWARE OF. they complained that I was annoying for "following them" and asking who was invited to an event when I was left out. They then decided on the spot to move tables and leave me and my one friend. This is so messed up. In hindsight, I now realize that the on my reason the trusting thing was brought up was so they could have a good reason to leave me without looking lik monsters. It is only two of the friends who are actively involved and the other three are against me just because they want to be part of their group. This all happened on a three day weekend and I'm so scared of what is going to happen at school. It really bothers me that they act so normal at school and accused me of hurting them many times. If I had hurt them without meaning to I wish they would have told me sooner. This is very confusing and hurtful to me but I've been afraid to say I'm hurt because I know they will just bring up old SOLVED problems and make it worse. The only problem is that I still love them and want to.be friends. When I told them how messed up it is to leave they replied with "you have other friends" DOES THAT IN ANY WAY MAKE IT OK? And yes it may sound stupid but it really does mean so.much to me because I had just moved two years before with no friends and once I.finally got into a comfortable group they leave. The thing us that I'm not trying to say I'm the only one thinking straight but I.honestly think it is true. I'm the only.one looking at the whole situation and not just at themself. It really makes me sad that they faked having fun with me or are lying to me now just to get rid of me. Was it something I did or said? And before people tell me.just to make more friends I have to say it's not that easy because everyone has known each other at my school for years and I'm still the one who moved. Just one more thing that bothers me, before the two friends who turned everyone else against me I WAS THE ONE WHO LET THEM SIT ALONG WITH US IN THE FIRST PLACE. Every time I think about this whole situation I either throw up in my mouth or cry. I really feel terrible. It bothers me so.much that everyone is joining this messed up plan to abandon me just because they only hear one side of the story. But my feelings obviously don't matter it's only them. I apologized billions of times and yet they don't care. This subject was just brought up so they could abandon me without giving me another chance.

[2NDFLOOR]

Wow, it's easy to see why you are so upset by this situation. It sounds like not only was there a lot of back talking by people you trusted, but now it sounds like you're on the outs with the group, having done nothing. While this situation sounds very unfair, remember that you don't have control over other people's actions. You only have control over your actions and reactions to others. So try to decide what is the best way for you to personally handle this situation. You said that you've tried some things already that haven't worked, maybe try going to some of the other people involved indirectly and see how they feel about the situation. Maybe try working on other friendships or brand new ones (agreed, it can be hard, but not impossible). Maybe give them their space and see if their attitudes and feelings change over time. In any case, don't let a bad experience discourage you from developing new and better friendships over time. Call or text us any time at 888-222-2228.