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So this Christmas, my grandfather is coming to stay with us. I'm very close with my family, but not with him. He never made an attempt to have a meaningful relationship with his grandchildren and I've never even been to his house. Christmas and Birthday presents were non existent and I don't even think he knows how old I am. (Long story short...I am not really looking to bond with him at this point ad have leaned to expect nothing from him) My cousins and I all feel the same way. It's just awkward with him around most of the time. He's very "stuck in the past" and always finds things to complain about and has many excuses as to why he won't move any closer to us and try to enjoy life. I see him a few times a year, which is fine but something about waking up with him on Christmas morning with him there watching my parents and I open gifts bothers me, but I feel guilty about it as well. My dad says that he doesn't want him to be alone, which I agree with, because no one should be alone on Christmas. I always try to have a good heart,...I just want to make the best of it but don't know how.
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So it sounds like you and your family have big hearts! There are a lot of people who have a relative in their family that is not warm, happy or stuck in the past, so the best way to deal with that is to keep on smiling, a smile goes along way. Don't let someone else's mood affect you Christmas memories. Just remember there is nothing that you can do to change his behavior but you have control over your reactions, so just enjoy the holidays with your family. If you need to talk call 2NDFLOOR at 888-222-2228 or test 2NDFLOOR on Fridays at 908-280-0235 from 4-8 pm.
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