I'm struggling

[Guest]

it's been happening for a while. the sadness. I haven't told anyone how much I feel it. I don't want to seem like I'm looking for attention but I just want someone, anyone to notice. I don't know how to make them see how much I'm struggling and want to hurt myself :/ I have a friend who deals with stuff like this but 10x worse than me. I feel that I shouldn't be sad about my life when their life is so much worse than mine. Also, I'm so close to them. She is like my platonic soulmate but she still can't see how much I'm struggling because she's focused on hers. which I'm glad she is cause I want her to be better but I'm also focused on her more than me which idk if that's good or bad. Like I want someone to be there for me like I try to be for her. she just doesn't reciprocate anything. the most she ever does is say I love you to me. and then gets upset when I don't say it back cause I cant. I feel that way but I can't force it out if my goddamn mouth. Why can't I just be normal and not be fucked in the head?! I wanna end it but I know I won't. or maybe I will idk. some fucked up shit might happen and then I'll get worse to the point of no return. I really just want someone to see that I'm not okay.

[2NDFLOOR]

If no one knows that you need help, it's not likely to happen automatically. Getting help is something that you need to be pro-active in like reaching out for it. If your friends are not able to be that help for you, then talk to your guardians about some form of mental health therapy, which is probably better for you anyway. Hurting yourself in any fashion is never the solution to any problem and you should be getting help for any feelings or thoughts that are telling you to harm yourself in any way. It's great that you are there for your friends, but they can't always give you the help you need and it sounds like that's the case here, so again, professional help is probably the best way to go. If you ever feel like you might hurt yourself, contact the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-TALK. You can also talk or text with us at 888-222-2228.

[Guest]

I've been struggling lately too, my life has been up's and downs, and i try to blame other's but the reality is that it's all my fault. I switched schools to get e new start, and it was such a good time and i was so happy. But recently i said shit about this girl from my old school and things have gone down hill real fast. I don't know why i do half the shit that I do, it's all so stupid but i always fuck up someone and go into a stage of anxiety and hate. I hate a lot of things but the reality is that i just hate myself. I don't know how i'm going to get out of this hole, escpecially since i got my phone taken away so i can't contact my real friends. I understand what it's like to feel hopeless, becasue that's what i feel now. And i know that people are going through worse stuff then i am, but i've gone through hell recently with stuff that happened between my family. I just have a question, do you think it's right to take a teenagers phone away? escpecially for a long period of time?

[Guest]

Please know that you are seen and heard here. Also know that you sound like a great friend, but make sure you aren't putting the needs of others before your own. For instance, try not to compare yourself to your friend and know that your feelings are valid no matter what you have going on with your life. I too have struggled a lot in the last two years between the pandemic and school. One of the best decisions I made was to let someone know. It was not easy and my stomach dropped as I cried telling my mom that I wasn't okay but the support I received was all worth it. If there is anyone in your life like a parent, sibling, friend, teacher, therapist, etc who you feel comfortable talking to please do it. Just one person knowing what you are going through may take a huge weight off your chest.