So done

[Unregistered]

In this story, im going to change peoples names to protect their privacy. This year has been extremely rough, not just for me but for all my friends & family. I'm a sophomore in high school. It all started on January 25th. I walked into school, my bongo in hand, excited to be jamming with my friend N during lunch & then performing at a sweet 16 that Friday night. But something seemed up, & the halls were especially quiet. I saw my friend N in the hall, & she said to me "S, do you know?" & I said "Know what?" She looked at me with tear stained eyes. "They are saying that T died last night in the hospital because a rare case if the flu." I looked at her. It was a joke. It was some sick joke. N & I walked to my locker where my boyfriend & best guy friend were. By the look in their eyes it was true. But how did I not know? My childhood friend, I had known him since I could remember knowing anyone & he was gone now, & so unexpected & it was so hard to believe. I called my house before the recorded school message could tell them, because they had known J too for his entire life. I was sobbing when I called them. & my little brother S looked up to him so much. Sorry Im really bad at describing this but my message is getting really long & I have to sum it up. I just can't get over the fact that he's gone, & he was only 16 years old for nine days. I miss him so incredibly much, he always had a way of bringing a smile to your face, no matter what. He always used to remind me of how beautiful I was & that he loved me. I just need to write this all down because the horribleness doesn't end there.
About a month later, a 12 year old boy in our community died a few days later from having severe burns from a house fire. 12 years old?! Why?! But it doesn't end there.
About a month after that, my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years broke up with me because he wanted to be with other girls. I was upset, but was happy the relationship ended because it was very toxic. A few days later my best guy friend J started to make his feelings known that he liked me, but he had a girlfriend who was psycho & controlled him.
He kissed me at the roller rink about two weeks after P broke up with me & promised he'd be with me & that he'd break up with L. He broke up with her that weekend then he acted like my boyfriend & then got back together with her that Monday night, claiming he basically lied about his feelings towards me. Ugh.
I'm sorry this is so long I just needed to vent. Just this past Friday another kid at my high school committed suicide. Why is there so much death?

[2NDFLOOR]

You did the right thing by reaching out. It sounds like you have been having a very difficult time over the past couple months. Whenever there is a death in a school, most of the time counseling services are offered. Did you have a chance to do that? Counseling is very helpful for dealing with grief and loss issues, since it prevents you from bottling things up. If not, can you speak with your parents about getting counseling, they sound like they would understand since they knew T as well. Friends and family that have also experienced similiar events are also good to talk to about what you have going on in your life. As for you love life, be patient, the right person is out there somewhere and when you find him you'll know and it will make waiting for them worthwhile. If you ever need to vent, feel free to call us at 888-222-2228 we are here 24-7 to discuss any issues you need to.

[Unregistered]

i just want to say that i might not exactly know hwat your going through but ive also lost someone too to suicide. im here if u need to talk my tumblr is echo-of-my-voice