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I lost some friends

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  • I lost some friends

    So my friend group is mainly 12 and 11 year olds (I’m 12). A few months ago I tried to get help from my best friend at the time about my depression/suicidal thoughts. We had been friends since forever. I asked him not to tell anybody, but he took a screenshot of what I said and posted it in random group chats, some with people I didn’t even know that he had met online. Didn’t realize about it until one of my other friends asked if I was okay. From then on, my old friend group basically ignored me. Some of them didn’t, and I’m still friends with them, but then I just started becoming more isolated and having more online friends than real life ones. Then, I just stopped talking with everybody. Nobody’s talked to me either.

  • #2
    I commend you for your bravery in reaching to someone to get help for your depression and suicidal thoughts. It can be really scary to talk about your innermost thoughts and feelings like that. I can only imagine the sense of hurt and betrayal you felt when you learned your best friend shared your words with people you didn’t even know. To know someone you trusted revealed one of your most vulnerable moments to strangers sounds devastating. Even more so to lose total contact with friends as a result. It makes sense that you’d begin to distance yourself from people after being hurt so deeply. Please know that the treatment you received after confiding in your best friend is not your fault or a poor reflection on you. It’s quite possible that your best friend felt overwhelmed and was unsure of how to best help you. Depression and suicide are tough topics, especially for 11 and 12 year olds to navigate. It may be that your friend group wasn’t fully equipped to handle the gravity of how hard things have been for you. Though that doesn’t mean it was wrong of you to share your feelings or that you’re too much to deal with. It’s more likely that your friend group felt uncomfortable and unsure of how to act. It’s kind of like asking for your friends’ help after breaking your leg. Your friends would probably be worried and scared for you and recognize the urgency of the situation. They’d also recognize they didn’t have the resources to help you by themselves and would try to reach out for additional support. If you haven’t already, it’s important to share your experience of depression and suicidal thoughts with a trusted adult to receive the best support possible. I would imagine things have gotten even harder now that you mentioned you’ve become more isolated. You don’t deserve to suffer alone. You did a great thing to help yourself by reaching out here! Feel free to reach us at 888-222-2228 via call/text if you’d like to talk more about this. Thank you for contacting 2NDFLOOR Youth Helpline!

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