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friend cuts herself
So I have a really good friend that I met when I needed a friend most. She means the world to me but she has a lot of baggage. Not saying that makes me love her less, I'm just worried for her. She is bisexual, and has tried to come out to her parents only to be rejected and asked not to mention it bc her parents wanted grandkids. She was sexually assaulted last year and when she told her parents they told her it was her fault for "not saying no clearly" "going to his house in the first place" and "always dressing like a slut". She is an alcoholic (we're both very underage) and she wants to experiment with drugs. She knows i don't approve and she gets sad when I"m clearly dissapointed in her. So last week she had some bandages on her arm and I grabbed her there. She cried out in pain and when i asked she said it was nothing. Now i'm not stupid enough to believe that so I asked her to not lie. She told me that she cut herself but that she only does it when she feels like she should be punished. She won't tell her therapist bc her therapist would tell her parents and she doesn't want to seem like more of a disapointment than she already feels. I don't know how I can help her because she just won't listen to me and I don't know how to get through to her.
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You sound like a really good, caring person and a good friend. Unfortunately, some of these things that you're friend is putting on your shoulders aren't something you should be handling. They are matters for properly trained adults. The issues you are describing like being sexually assaulted, drinking (maybe drug use) and cutting are all very serious things that should all be addressed sooner rather than later. I would suggest involving an adult, even if that is not something she would want you to do. Maybe a guidance counselor in her school. Maybe her therapist or her parents, but someone that is in a position to ensure she gets the help she needs. Call or text us anytime at 888-222-2228. -
She had a therapist that wasn't working out for her. She didn't connect ig or there was some other reason she didn't tell me. Even if I did tell a guidance counsiler I doubt she would say anything to them. She tried to tell the school and police about being assaulted bc she didn't want the guy to get away with it. But the school said they couldn't do anything and the police said the same. Is there anything I can do as a friend to just make her feel better? I doubt anything I say will make her stop but I just don't want her to feel like a dissapointment anymore when she means so much to me and literally pulled me out the depression i was in. She saved me and I just want to save her back.Comment
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You are a great friend for continuing to reach out for help on this, but I would still suggest that you involving an adult is best in this situation. You can try telling an adult you trust like a guidance counselor or parent so that they can make sure that she is linked with the help she needs. You can also let her know about 2NDFLOOR. We are here 24/7 at 888-222-2228.Comment
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